For many, today starts the return to normal, the 1st full week of 2013, the first Monday of January (got a case of the Mondays?). Six days into the new year, and new goals may still be riding the bench, waiting for action. Other goals of flossing daily, responding to emails immediately, or others my be on the way to becoming new habits and routines for the new year.
As for me…
Growing up in a household where emotions were not verbally expressed frequently, I now find myself on the other end where I help people express and verbalize their own feelings (but that’s a different post). I always wondered how I would be as a father, whether I would nurture and relate to my own as my parents had, or whether I would be different. Something that I realized before the 2012 closed was that I would hear and watch others so easily verbalize love for their children, both dads and moms, and got to thinking why that was so difficult for me.
While not one for grand resolutions or new year’s goals, I decided to that 2013 would be the year that I say “love” more frequently, not in a way to degrade or cheapen the feeling, but to put “love” out there first, rather than be an unspoken understanding or a feeling that does not get communicated enough. I’m curious to see how this will personally change my interactions and relationships with others.
How about you, what will you work on this year? What about love? The world can use a little bit more love, no?
“I want someone to love” or “I want someone to love me”…On the eve of Valentine’s Day, these declarations emerge along with aisles of heart-shaped boxes of assorted chocolates. How does one find love? Where does one find love? Is it internet dating sites? Being set up by friends/family.
In looking for love, I think we have to start with our selves: Do we love our selves? Do we treat our selves with care and respect? In other words, do we have a good relationship with our selves?
In a relationship being mindful of the needs of someone else and your self is not easy. You may find yourself giving more in a relationship, or you may find yourself taking more in a relationship. This inequality could eventually lead to problems where you’re neglecting yourself or the other person. So what’s love of self got to do with any of this?